weak minded

Being alone can get lonesome at times, so I succumbed to the proposition of being set up on a blind date. I thought that it might be nice to meet someone, and with these thoughts in mind, I was determined to make a real attempt to like this lady, whoever she might be. Mind over matter, right?

I showered with great precision, even making sure to soap up behind my ears and in between my toes...two spots that haven't been thoroughly scrubbed since I was five. I gave myself an extra close shave. Deodorized, moisturized, gelled, brushed, and gargled. I applied just the right amount of my 'special occasion' cologne, which hasn't been applied for quite sometime now, taking careful precautions to ensure that just the right proximity would be needed to get a whiff of my musky yet intoxicating scent.

Keeping an open mind, I headed off to the restaurant...determined that I was going to like whoever this lady happened to be. The power of persuasion, right?

I waited in the lobby and watched as you entered, thinking silently to myself, 'please, don't be the one...please, don't be the one'...but you were the one. So we sat. I stared across the table at you, determined that I would come to like you...the way your chins bounced and billowed upon your neck, the peculiar beak-like shape of your nose, the dry and outdated mass of hair which sat atop your head. Perhaps, if I tried, I could come to find these things endearing...it's all about will power, right?

Our waitress approached to take our order. I looked up and found myself wishing that it was her sitting across from me rather than you. It was at this point that I had to admit defeat. Alas, my powers of mind control just aren't strong enough.