the experts have concluded that the job market must be pretty bad

Today, for the first time in about two months, I had a job interview. And this caused a minor flurry of unemployed-doldrums excitement, providing a nice break from the limited afternoon television choices that are usually offered.

The job was for a Staffing Specialist at a local staffing agency, and while the position sounded moderately boring, the promise of bi-weekly paychecks made it seem like the perfect job for me. I walked in, signed the little 'sign in' sheet on the front counter, and noticed that sitting three names above mine, was the name of a girl who used to work at my ex-place of employment. She had come in earlier that day to interview for the same position that I was there for. This girl had been laid off about six months before I was, and a sudden moment of anxiety hit that I, too, may very likely still be unemployed almost a year later.

Eventually, Kelly came out to usher me into a backroom where she'd be interviewing me. We sat and she said, "Gee, I can't believe how many applications I got for this one job posting! The market must be really bad out there, huh?"

To which I thought, 'You're a staffing agent! Shouldn't you be well aware of how crappy the job market is?' What actually came out of my mouth, however, was "yes, it's pretty bad out there."

Kelly flips through my resume, asks a few questions, and then decides, "you know, I'm not sure that you could handle being a staffing specialist. It's very fast paced and you seem like you're more detail oriented and precise. Am I right? I bet I'm right. I've been staffing for several years and I'm incredibly good at reading people. I'm worried that you wouldn't be able to handle the stress and speed that we staffing agents must have. However, you seem creative and would be perfect in our marketing department. Unfortunately, we don't have a marketing department. But I've mentioned before that we should have a marketing department, and if we end up creating a marketing department, I will definitely keep you in mind."

And this is how I got a potential job offer for a position that doesn't exist. Yes, it's good to know that years of education and experience have made me the perfect candidate for a non-existent position.

Kelly stood up, offered me her hand, and told me, "you know, I've run out of business cards, otherwise I would give you one...sorry. But you know, we are in the business of finding people jobs, and we do staff for full-time positions, so it might be in your best interest to fill out an application with us. It's free, and if you don't like the jobs that we offer to place you at, you can always say 'no'."

And it was here, at the point where my job interview became a sales pitch, that I knew I wouldn't be working for them anytime soon. Though, to be sure, I sealed my fate by not taking an application to enroll in their service as I walked out the door.